Of Wings and Anchors
by Nash Nine
Summary: Chapter 5. If there were tears that was shed, Ipin said nothing. If Ipin felt Lambo take her hand and squeezed it like she would disappear in a second, Ipin said nothing. And if Ipin felt her heart break into a million pieces as her best friend break down, Ipin said nothing.
1. Chapter 1:Nobody hurts my Tail Head

Summary: Because nobody messes with Ipin and gets away with it. Not when Lambo was around

* * *

 _You have always been the place. You are a woman who can build it yourself. You were born to build_

 _-Sarah Kay_

* * *

Age 18

Sometimes Lambo really hated Ipin.

Sure the girl was great. She was smart and funny. And also a very useful meat shield against Gokudera and Reborn. But sometimes, when her feelings and emotions are involved, she gets blind sighted by it. And it's like it's the only thing she sees and nothing else matters anymore.

Like now, for example, when Ipin was reduced to this crying, pathetic mess of a person. Times like this, Lambo remembers that Ipin wasn't all that strong, that somewhere deep inside of her, there was this insecure and sensitive girl. He hated seeing her miserable. And here's the ironic part, it's all because of a guy.

A freaking guy

Some sorry excuse of man was able to reduce his best friend, the most amazing ass-kicking machine of a woman who doesn't take crap from others, to a heap of sobs and snots on the bathroom floor. And Lambo was furious. His guts were boiling with rage, his instincts were screaming for him to carve the skin off of that son of a bitch and make him regret ever making a tear fall off his best friend's face.

But instead, he was helpless.

Lambo didn't know what to do. He wanted to comfort his best friend. To let her know that everything's going to be okay, to whisper meaningless promise of comfort into her ears but he wasn't cruel nor was he a liar. He wasn't naïve enough to believe that everything was going to be okay because it's far from okay. His best friend was crawled up in a fetus position looking like the world was ending. It was _very_ far from okay. And he didn't have the resolve or the stomach to lie to his best friend.

And it burned him to not be able to do anything. To look down and see his best friend crying, it burned him to his very core.

All of his life, Ipin has always been his anchor. She was always there right beside him, keeping his resolve strong, supporting him through every furious storm and raging winds. She made sure that no matter the circumstance, even if the odds are stacked against their favor, Ipin was always there to steady him, to keep his feet firmly in the ground. Ipin made sure that Lambo will never sink into depression.

And it killed him and it filled his body with shame, to see her like this and not be able to help.

So instead, Lambo sat beside Ipin. Their backs against the bathroom wall, and he held her tight in his arms, hoping that it would be enough solace, hoping to let her know that he was there. And no matter what, he will never leave her. Hoping to hell and back that it might help her forget the douche bag that made her cry, even for just a moment.

It hurts him to see his best friend like this. Even though they've known each other since they were kid, this was a part of Ipin that Lambo never saw before. Ipin hid it well. It was buried in a soil of distrust, cemented by reluctance, thickened by betrayal and encased by solitude.

And Ipin let that bastard in. She trusted him to see her for what she really was. And in the end, that bastard broke her.

It took every self-control Lambo had to not go out and tear that bastard limb by limb and shoot him in the head afterwards. But Ipin needed him right now, to be her anchor, to stop her from drifting and drowning into this sea of depression and loneliness that bastard pushed her into.

He began stroking her hair. It took a while but soon enough her sobs got weaker and she was able to compose herself again. But the arms around Lambo were still there.

She still needed him.

Lambo looked at her, "Are you gonna tell me what happened?"

It took a minute or two before she responded, "I saw him kissing some girl in a bar," she said not facing Lambo, her head still lying in his chest.

And that was all it took for Lambo to start feeling this uncontrollable urge to torture the son of a bitch.

Lambo tightened his arms around Ipin, letting him know that he won't leave her. Also, trying to calm himself, his guts were burning with rage every part of his body wanted to hunt the fucker down and shoot him right in the head. He trusted that dipshit to take care of his best friend. He even threatened him to treat her with respect.

* * *

 _Lambo was in the common room, alone with the asshole that Ipin started dating. He was looking at him, trying gouge if he was good enough for his best friend. But who was he kidding, anyway? Ipin was his best friend; even Captain freaking America wasn't good enough for her. It was his duty to keep her safe and happy. And if this frail and lame looking Edward Cullen wannabe makes her happy, he would step aside. Albeit, reluctantly._

" _So how long have you known Ipin?" Lambo hated this. He was starting to act as if he was Ipin's father._

" _For a few weeks now, we actually met at one of the galas the Vongola Family hosted. And it is such an honor to meet you. Gosh, the lightning—"_

" _Okay listen well, Rapunzel," Lambo interrupted him, grossed out by the patronizing the guy was doing. "Ipin is my best friend. You try to hurt her, you try to make her cry, hell, if you try to damage even a single molecule in her body, I will make sure you die a painful death. I will hunt you down and I will tear your skin from your body slowly so you can feel every agonizing pain I can inflict on you. I will tear you limb by limb until you beg me to kill you." Lambo grabbed the knife hidden inside his shirt and began to twirl it, "Do I make myself clear?"_

" _I don't respond to threat very well," the fucker said, looking him in the eye_

 _Lambo felt like laughing, the poor son of a bitch didn't know what was going on. So as a demonstration, Lambo launched himself into the table, stabbing the knife close to where his hands were and pulling him by the collar of his shirt until he was centimeters away from his face. Then, he smiled," I really don't do threats. I make promises. And I never break them, so consider this a demonstration."_

* * *

And later, when Ipin was asleep and no longer crying, he would make good with that promise. But right now, his best friend still needed him.

"That fucking bastard, I knew he was bad news. Please tell me you're going to leave him now, Ipin" Lambo felt her stiffen against his hold and she hid her face in his chest. With a sigh, he said, "You're not gonna leave him, are you?"

He felt her nod, "I hope you know that you're better off without that son of a bitch. In fact, I think you'll be happier without the fucker," he tried to convince her. "He's dragging you down, Ipin."

" I-I really don't expect you to understand. Lambo, but when I'm with him, I don't feel like an assassin or a weapon. He makes me feel like I'm pretty. Like I'm a woman," she was now facing him, looking at him in the eyes.

Lambo couldn't believe what he was hearing. This was coming from the girl who had a crush on the most dangerous prefect in the whole fucking world and she is letting some screwed up son of a bitch control her like she was some mindless puppy. But Lambo wouldn't have any of that, it might be hard, but he'll make her see reason.

It was usually the other way around but there's always a first time for everything.

"Pretty? You've got to be kidding me," he adjusted her hold on her so that they were facing each other,"you are so much more than pretty. Hell,pretty doesn't even begin to describe you." Lambo held her shoulder as if shaking her to see reason, "You are funny and smart and strong. You're an ass-kicking she-hulk who's not afraid to say what's on her mind. You are a gallon of awesomeness and and a liter of weirdness. You are a big contradiction wrapped around in a silk of mystery. You are the personification of amazing," Lambo held her face, "Pretty is a big understatement. It's an insult for someone as amazing as you."

And then the waterworks began again. _Well, that wasn't supposed to happen,_ Lambo thought despairingly as he watched his best friend cry into his chest again.

"Thank you, Lambo. Really. But, I don't know if I can leave him. I thought he was the one, you know."

Lambo scoffed, "The one? What the hell is wrong with you, woman? You don't need him. In fact, you don't need any man for that matter. You are an independent, empowered woman of the 21th century. You don't need no man," he said jokingly.

And when she began to laugh, Lambo knew that Ipin was gonna be okay. Lambo knew that he did some good.

"Alright, listen to me. I'm only gonna say this once because I really hate chick-flic moments so this is a once in a lifetime opportunity. And also there's snot in my favorite shirt," he looked at her in the eyes to show his sincerity, "You are an amazing woman. You are not a snack or a joke or a puch line or a toy." He held Ipin's cheek and caressed it with his thumb," You are a woman, skin and bones, veins and flesh. And there will be more douchebags like him so you show them what a real woman looks like. Motherfuckers like them have never seen one before," his voice was full of conviction, " And don't you dare forget that you don't need anyone to tell you how amazing and great you are. You hear me?"

Ipin closed her eyes and leaned her face in his hands, "I hear you."

And there it was, that amazing smile that never failed to dazzle him. And he couldn't help but smile as well.

Their moment was broken when Fuuta came barging in, almost breaking the door in the process. "Where is that bastard?! I told you that guy was a bad idea! But does anyone listen to me?" Fuuta was flailing his arms, using that mother hen voice, "Nooo, you just had to go and date that stupid excuse of a scumbag. At least tell me you're breaking up with him." Fuuta looked at Ipin, waiting for her to defend herself.

Bu she hid her head in Lambo's shoulder, trying to muffle the laughter that was bubbling up inside.

Fuuta sighed, "This is what I get for taking care of you guys. Headaches. If I die young, I'm blaming it all on you," his hand was now in his forehead, trying to stop the incoming migraine.

"Yes, I am going to break up with him. God, I was so stupid. What the hell did I see in that guy?"

Lambo took this opportunity to tease his best friend. He didn't like chick-flic moments, after all. "Well you said that he looked like a prince right out of a fairy tale story. With hair that's so wavy and that shines when in the sun. But if you ask me, he kinda looked like a Rapunzel looking One Direction reject."

Ipin slapped him on the shoulders, trying to keep the laughter from escaping." Come on, you've got to admit, Ipin, the guy wore some pretty tight jeans. I think he was overcompensating for something."

Fuuta joined in," Flower gleam and glow, man"

Ipin laughed hard, "You two are jerks."

"Well, this has been nice and pretty scarring but I have to go now. I could only tolerate so much touchy feely in one day." Lambo pretended to grimace.

When Fuuta left and Lambo was almost out of the door, Ipin stopped him. "You're gonna torture him, aren't you?"

Lambo faced Ipin and gave her the most innocent look he could muster, "Little ole' me?! Why, I would never! I thought you trusted me, Ipin. How can you say that? I'm practically harmless."

Ipin gave him a deadpanned look that said _Don't you dare try that bullshit on me. I will kill you, "_ At least let me come. This is my fight, not yours."

Lambo sighed, "Nope. Nuh uh. Over my dead fucking body. You're never going to have the misfortune of seeing that bastard's face ever again. Not if I can help it. Plus, I didn't threaten to torture him. I promised that I'd torture. There's a difference." Lambo said as if he was just explain that the sky was blue and the plants were green and that bastard's face is going to be dyed with his own blood. Ipin looked at Lambo's green eyes, they were filled with mischievousness and bloodlust and his face was adorned with a smirk, "And you know me, I never break my promises."

Ipin relented, " At least, kick him in the groin for me, okay?"

And with that Lambo left, his laughter filling the hallways of the Vongola Mansion. His mind was already twisting and turning, trying to find the cruelest and bloodiest way to torture the motherfucker. He was going to make him regret hurting Ipin.

After all, nobody hurts his tail head. Not when he was around.

* * *

 _Sneak Peek for chapter 2_

 _Age 6_

 _Lambo hated school._

 _It was shove-a-book-in-the-throat-stab-a-pencil-in-the-hand boring. He already knew the lessons. Hell, it was for toddlers. Lambo really hated in when Tsuna forgets that he was from a mafia family. A science-based mafia family for that matter. These lessons were like an insult to him. Lambo knew how to count and how to add and subtract ever since he was an infant._

 _It also doesn't help that he has all of this pent up energy just waiting to burst out him. It was making every second in this sorry excuse of a learning institution a lot more agonizing than it has to be._

 _The teachers doesn't make it easier, in fact, they make it a whole times worse. Tsuna told him that teachers were supposed to be like Kyoko and Haru. They were supposed to be all nice and glittery. Well, Tsuna was a lying liar who lies. They were the opposite of nice and glittery. It was like they had a stick stuck up their cakehole themselves. Lambo really doesn't know what that means but he heard Gokudera say it when he gets angry with stupid and stuck up people, so Lambo thought it was appropriate._

 _He doesn't even understand why he has to be here. He was supposed to be the Lightning Guardian. His future was pretty much determined._

* * *

 **Author's Notes: Well, I have all of this incomplete ideas in my head about KHR so I made this. I hope that you guys liked it, and if not, well, flames are always welcome. They are the light that shines through my web-filled brain. Anyways, please review :)**


	2. Chapter 2: Somewhere I can't follow

Summary: Lambo hates it when Ipin goes somewhere he can't follow.

* * *

Age 6

Lambo hated school.

It was shove-a-book-in-the-throat-stab-a-pencil-in-the-hand boring. He already knew the lessons. Hell, it was for toddlers. Lambo really hated it when Tsuna forgets that he was from a mafia family. A science-based mafia family for that matter. These lessons were like an insult to him. Lambo knew how to count and how to add and subtract ever since he was an infant.

It also doesn't help that he has all of this pent up energy just waiting to burst out him. It was making every second in this sorry excuse of a learning institution a lot more agonizing than it has to be.

The teachers doesn't make it easier,either, in fact, they make it a whole lot worse. Tsuna told him that teachers were supposed to be like Kyoko and Haru. They were supposed to be all nice and glittery. Well, Tsuna was a lying liar who lies. They were the opposite of nice and glittery. It was like they had a stick stuck up their cakehole themselves. Lambo really doesn't know what that means but he heard Gokudera say it when he gets angry with stupid and stuck up people, so Lambo thought it was appropriate.

He doesn't even understand why he has to be here. He was supposed to be the Lightning Guardian. His future was pretty much determined.

Not that he'd ever let Tsuna hear that. He was the reason why he was stuck in this hellhole in the first place (he heard _hellhole_ from Mukuro, and again, it seems pretty appropriate). Tsuna was determined for Lambo to have a normal childhood. And nothing says normal than being encased in a four-sided room wallowing in boredom. Well, screw normal. He was a part of mafia for god's sake. Lambo has been in the mafia far longer than Tsuna has and Lambo was a 6-year-old child. He is far from normal. He has guns and bombs hidden inside his afro. He was learned how to fire a gun long before he was potty trained, that was not normal. In fact, it was the complete opposite of normal.

And no matter how much Tsuna wants him to be normal, Lambo knew that he'd just disappoint himself in the end. It was naivety to think of normal in their line of business.

* * *

Before getting enrolled, there was this big debacle about going to Italy for the Vongola Decimo's Family' training. Of course, it didn't end well. Hibari was sizzling with fury and rage that someone had the audacity to even suggest that he should leave his beloved Namimori. Mukuro was poking Gokudera and Hibari into annoyance. So in the end, they decided to stay in Namimori until Tsuna and the others finished with high school and there was brand new bulging hole in Tsuna's room. All in all, it was a good day. After all, nobody died.

Vongola Nono said that it would be good training for them to gain more experience before living in Italy but Lambo called bullshit, Nono was just afraid that the Vongola Manor would be reduced to rubbles and ashes when they stayed there.

It goes without saying that Lambo was pissed off about the decision. He was about to go back to his hometown but they stopped him. Instead, he had to stay in school and interact with these snot-filled toddlers. He pitched a fit about it but Reborn could be pretty convincing when he has a gun pointing right at his forehead.

So here he was, stuck in this hellhole filled with snot-nosed peasants and sinfully boring teachers. Ugh, just kill him now.

* * *

This was the last class left and after that he's free. And the clock won't go any faster, times like these, Lambo wished he still had the ten-year bazooka but after that stunt with Byakuran, Tsuana and Reborn decided to destroy.

Lambo guessed that the only thing good about this place was Ipin was with him. Ipin, God bless her soul, made sure that he doesn't be alone in this stink of a place. She defended him from the teachers when they were being mean. She lets him copy her homework.

And she's a great meat shield against bullies. It pays to have a crazy assassin Kung-Fu expert as his best friend.

Finally, Lambo heard the bell rang and it took all his control not to stand up and dance the Macarena in joy. When the teacher left, he went straight to Ipin's table. They always go home together, Lambo suggested that they get picked up from school because it saves the hassle of walking and getting kidnapped by enemies of Vongola but nooooo, naïve Tsuna who wants him to be normal said that normal 6-year-old kid doesn't get picked up by limousines. So there goes that plan.

They were about to leave the room when a hand grabbed him by the shoulder and stopped him. Lambo turned to look and saw that it was Morita Keiji. He was like the king of preschool, in which Lambo thought was pretty lame. Lambo knew the first time that he saw Morita, Lambo would spend the rest of his life avoiding him. It wasn't that he hated Morita but if he was burning and Lambo was the only one with water, he'd rather drink it. Morita was your everyday typical bully. But every time Lambo looks at him, his opinion about Morita gets worse and worse.

Morita was like a wart that just wouldn't go away.

"Hey, afro nerd, give me your money." And this was just so typical of bullies. It was so typical that it made Lambo sick. _God, he looks fugly,_ Lambo thought.

"Lambo-san doesn't really associate himself with peasants like you." Lambo referred to himself as a third person to annoy the creep. Usually, he only does that when he wants piss someone off.

"What did you say? Just because you're some smart ass kid doesn't make you better than me. It just makes you a nerd." Keiji sneered.

 _So that's what this was about,_ Lambo thought. Before he got here, Morita was what you would call a teacher's pet. So it was like a slap to his face when Lambo came along with his shit-eating grin and smart-ass mouth who was way better than him. Also, to add to the burn, he doesn't respect the teachers.

"Nope, you're right. Being smart doesn't make you better than Lambo-san, it just makes you jealous." And with that Lambo turned to leave.

"Hey, wait a minute, you jerk." Morita was about to punch him when Ipin caught his fist and twisted it behind his back. "If you're so jealous of Lambo, why don't you go crack a book and get better. Don't give your crap to someone else."

And as far as preschool fights go, that was outright badass. "I knew I keep you around for a reason, tail head. ' Lambo said with a grin as they start to walk home.

Ipin scoffed," Please. Without me, you'd crash and burn."

* * *

They were crossing the alleyway when a hand reached out knocked them both to the ground. Lambo woke up to see Ipin tied up in a post beside him. They were in some kind of warehouse. He tried to wiggle his way out of the rope but it was too tight.

"Ipin! Ipin, wake up." Lambo was getting worried.

"Huh?What the hell?" Ipin looked around to assess their situation. "Where are we?"

"Do I look like I know? See? This is why I wanted the limousines. It's like the fourth kidnapping this month, God" Lambo was starting get frustrated with the situation.

"But you've got to admit, it's good training. Also, do you really want to worry Tsuna. What happened to being normal?"

"Ugh, whatever. There's a knife in my afro" Ipin looked at him weirdly. "What? It's better safe than sorry. And it's not that weird." Lambo defended himself.

There was a lot of shuffling before Ipin got the knife. She was about to cut them free when the door opened.

"Well, aren't you the busy bees" Lambo observed the guy who spoke. He had tattoos everywhere and crazy-filled eyes. All in all, it was your everyday kidnapping psychopath.

"Well, aren't you the crazy pedophilic psychopath," Lambo said trying to buy sometime until Ipin got the rope cut behind them. "Let me guess, you want to rule the mafia world. But you're way too weak to do that so instead you resorted into kidnapping children. Am I right?"

Lambo didn't expect the slap that came after he said those words. He spit the blood and turned to look at the man. And with a smile Lambo said, "Oh, did I hit a nerve?"

The man scooted down to the floor so he was eye to eye with Lambo then he took his head and shoved it into the post. "The only reason that you're still alive is that I still have use for you. But when you start to become a liability," the man stopped and pulled Lambo's hair until they were only centimeters apart, "I will rip you apart, starting with that tongue of yours."

As far as scare tactics goes, that has to be the worst that he has ever seen. Lambo didn't even blink. So with a smirk on his face, he spit straight at the man's face, "Dude, you are so cliché."

The man stood up and kicked Lambo in the stomach. He curled at the pain but now wasn't the time to show weakness. Weakness gets you killed. That was the first lesson Lambo learned, so he smiled and look directly at the kidnapper, "When I get out of here, I will kill you myself. And not even God will be able to save you." His smile was now a full shit-eating grin because nothing says scary more than a child who's threatening to kill you with a smile plastered on his face.

Lambo felt the rope getting cut and before the man could say another word, Lambo kicked him where the sun doesn't shine. The kidnapper fell on the floor crutching his wounded stick, Lambo took the chance to kick him in the head in return.

Lambo felt Ipin behind him, "You're scary, you know that, broccoli monster."

He scoffed, "Please, the guy's just pathetic, that's all" Lambo turned to look at the window and saw that the sun was almost coming down, "Come on, Ipin. Let's go home. Tsuna must be starting to get worried."

They were almost out of the warehouse when a gun went off, grazing Ipin in the arm. He turned to look at kidnapper, his eyes were now burning with rage. Ipin was qiuck to act. She took the iron rod that was leaining against a crate. She deflected the bullets with the rod and when the man ran out of bullets. Ipin ran towards him and started beating the man with the rod. She stabbed him in the hand just for safety measure.

Meanwhile, Lambo was still shocked. His best friend almost got hurt. He let his guard down and his best friend almost paid the price. He was weak. After all this time, he was still weak. His insides were boiling with shame and self-hate. The image of Ipin getting glazed by the bullet was playing over and over his mind.

He got out of his stupor when he saw Ipin's hand waving over his face, she looked worried about him. He shook it off, remembering that he wasn't supposed to show weakness, friend and foes alike. Instead, he looked at her and hand-chopped her in the head, "That was the stupidest thing I ever saw," then he began to ruffle her hair so she wouldn't see his worried expression, there was some protest coming from her but he didn't care, what she did was stupid, " Don't do that again. You could have died. I forbid you to do that again."

She looked at him, like she was trying to observe him, it unnerved him a little. Then she smiled and said,"Gotcha" like she understand what exactly was running in his mind.

* * *

The walk back home was pretty quiet. Lambo wanted to say something but he didn't know what. The silence innerved him so he decided to throw the caution off the window and he grabbed Ipin's hand. Screw, showing weakness. Ipin was his friend. "You ever do that again, I will kill you myself." Then he whispered, just loud enough for her to hear, "Don't go somewhere I can't follow."

And Ipin was smiling all the way back home.

* * *

 _Sneak Peek for Chapter 3_

 _Age 13_

 _Lambo shut the door to his room._

 _He was filled with rage. He thought he could trust Ipin. For once in his life, he trusted someone. He let another person truly see him. And in th end, Ipin betrayed. Lambo tried to ignore the pain, so he focused on his rage. After all, it was better than betrayal._

* * *

 **Author's notes: I think I need to work on my story-telling skills but anyway please review :)**


	3. Chapter 3: Monopoly ruins friendship

Age 13

Lambo shut the door to his room.

He was filled with rage. He thought he could trust Ipin. For once in his life, he trusted someone. He let another person truly see him. And in th end, Ipin betrayed. Lambo tried to ignore the pain, so he focused on his rage. After all, it was better than betrayal.

He heard a knock on his door. "Lambo, come on, open up. Stop being so dramitic."

The nerve of that girl. Lambo continued to fume on his bed, ignoring the girl outside his room, " You know, I really thought I could trust you. Turns out you're just like every single one of them."

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"Don't play dumb with me. I know what you did. And you know what the sad thing is, Ipin? I thought you wouldn't betray me," by now Lambo was saying everything that he wanted to say, letting out every ugly emotions he felt.

"Lambo, please stop being so childish."

"I don't care what you say. You cheated on monoply!"

From the outer side of the room, Ipin face palmed. This was his best friend? Ipin needed to rethink some life choices.


	4. Chapter 4: Sneezing ruins dignity

Age 16

There has never been a worse time to sneeze.

He and Tsuna were fighting again. Sometimes, Lambo doesn't understand what he's doing wrong. Tsuna wanted him to go to school? Fine, school it is. Tsuna wanted him to make some friends? Gee, sure why not, even though they have the mental capacity of a duck. Tsuna wanted him to get good grades? Please, Lambo was born from a science-based famiglia, he eats high school lessons for breakfast.

But being a normal kid? Even for Tsuna, that's something Lambo would never do.

This all started when all of them were present for dinner. By now, it was an unwritten rule that they should all eat together for dinner. Everyone was free to spend breakfast and lunch however they wanted but dinner should be spent with family. Lambo used to like this rule but now, not so much. I mean, what kind of decent fellow would like having to sit through hours of interrogation and sermons? It was a different issue every day. And he was seriously reaching his boiling point.

So when Tsuna suddenly coughed, trying to get Lambo's attention, he only felt trepidation for what's about to come. _Here we go again,_ Lambo thought with great reluctancy.

"So I heard that you were sent to the principal's office today. Would you care to explain how that happened?"

Before he could talk, Gokudera barked at him, "Again? Stupid cow, what are we going to do with you? It's the third time this week. You're being troublesome for the tenth."

"Now now, Gokudera, don't you think we should let Lambo explain? I'm sure he has a perfect explanation for what happened, right Lambo?"

Lambo thanked his lucky stars for giving him a brother like Takeshi.

"It really wasn't my fault. I was perfectly civilized with the teacher."

"That still doesn't explain why you had to go to the principal's office," Tsuna said patiently, if there was one thing Lambo like about him, it was that he was fair.

So with a sigh, Lambo told them what happened, " The teacher wanted us to write all the things we hated about ourselves. I didn't want to so I said I'll take a zero for the activity. She said no so I was sent to the principal's office."

"You stupid cow! Are you really so narcissistic that you can't even write a single thing you hate about yourself?" Gokudera was fuming," Don't you know how much headaches you bring the tenth? Just how selfish could you be?" by the end of his rant he was already red.

The food was now forgotten. And everybody was looking at the both of them. It was a surprise for Lambo that Kyoya and Mukuro still hasn't left. But thinking about it now, they probably find this amusing.

"Oi, octopus head, calm down. We're still eating." Ryohei was the next to speak, trying calm Hayato down.

It just really wasn't fair. If they would just stop and try to understand Lambo, "Just how selfish could I be?" Lambo mirrored Hayato's words, "I didn't write the essay because I didn't want to participate in an activity that promoted self hate."

Everybody was surprised by what he said. The problem with his big brother, Lambo thinks, is that they still have it in their mind that he's still five. But that was really a long time ago, and he grew up, hopefully for the better.

Tsuna heaved a sigh, "You're just over thinking this, Lambo. Maybe the acti-"

"Am I really?" Lambo sneered. "Because I know people who could fill twenty pages of paper, front and back, of the thing they hate about themselves. And I am not about to promote something that would make people feel bad about themselves for."

In the corner of his eyes, he saw Ipin and Chrome sag their shoulders. Great, now he feels bad. But god damn it, he has principles.

"Lambo, please don't be so stubborn. Why can't you just fake it? I'm just asking you to be normal. How hard could that possibly be?"

And that's when he reached his boiling point.

"Normal? What the hell are you talking about, Tsuna?" Lambo was really getting tired of Tsuna's bullshit, he knew Tsuna meant well but everything he does is so very stifling that Lambo can't breathe anymore. "Look around you. You're in the mother effing mafia. Your friends are a smiling dork who wields a sword that can turn into a baseball bat, a dynamite wielding buffoon who's obsessed about you, a guy hell bent on destroying mafia and has a creepy laugh, a guy with the lame ass catchphrase, a girl with illusions as intestines, and a guy that is incapable of saying anything without shouting. No offense, you guys," Lambo said as an afterthought. "So if you want to continue living in that shell of yours, that's fine by me. Just don't drag me in it because I am under no illusion that I'm normal."

And as if the universe was conspiring against him. Lambo sneezed. As if the atmosphere wasn't already awkward, he just had to freaking sneeze. God, now he felt so embarrassed, and right after his kick ass monologue as well. Why does the universe hate him so?

Looking around, Lambo observed that everybody was either smirking or covering their mouth to try and stop the laughter bubbling up. Lambo wanted the ground to just swallow him whole.

"What I'm trying to say is I'm not a kid anymore. I have a mind of my own and, believe it or not, I have my own principles as well. And some may differ from yours but I'm going to stick by them because that's what you taught me." Trying to keep the little dignity he has left, Lambo turned to get up the table, "Thanks for the meal."

* * *

Later that night when Lambo was lounging in the library, he heard footsteps coming near him, to his surprise it was Hibari. Trying to think clearly, Lambo rationalized that he was just coming in here to get something. Yup,that's right no need panic, Lambo kept repeating it inside his head like a mantra. Until, Hibari sat right in front of him.

Now was maybe a good time to panic.

"Lame catchphrase, huh?"

Oh dear god, Lambo was still young. He doesn't wanna die yet. Lambo was scrambling for words to say when Kyoya stood up and patted him on the head," I was wrong about you. I look forward to what you do next." And with that, Hibari left.

Dazedly, Lambo touched the area Kyoya patted him. Lambo was dead, he was sure of it. He hit his head and died.

Lambo sat there for an unknown period of time, hand still on his head, when he felt Ipin hit him on the back but even that wasn't enough to shake him out of his stupor.

"There you are. I was looking everywhere for you. I was getting worried, you know."

"Hey, Ipin, Am I dead?"

Confused with her friends antics, Ipin just shook her head, "Yes, Lambo. You're dead. Now, we still have home works to do. Let's go"

Ipin thought that maybe her friend had matured, what with everything he said at dinner, but really at the end of the day, Lambo would always be a child at his very core. And Ipin wouldn't have him any other way.

 ** _To be continued_**


	5. Chapter 5: Supermarket Flowers

Title: Supermarket Flowers

Summary: If there were tears that was shed, Ipin said nothing. If Ipin felt Lambo take her hand and squeezed it like she would disappear in a second, Ipin said nothing. And if Ipin felt her heart break into a million pieces as her best friend break down, Ipin said nothing.

* * *

There was something addicting about hope.

Hope was the last line of defense before falling from desperation. Hope was the voice telling you _not yet_ in n empty waiting room _._ Hope was hearing the beep from the EKG. Hope was hearing her breathing, steady and strong.

And yet, like all things addicting, hope also destroys.

Like when he was so sure, so fucking sure, that it would be a success, that she would live, reality proves him wrong. Cold, cruel reality brings him down from his high dosage of hope and he fell. Reality brings him back by the squeaking of the doctor's shoes, unsure and guilty, by hearing no beep, by a still body with no breathe or any sign of life.

Reality brings him back, and he realized that there no longer be a soft smile waiting at the end of a gloomy day, a shoulder to cry on, a person to protect from his wretched world.

* * *

On the day of her funeral, the sun was shining bright, the birds were chirping, the breeze was relaxing, and there was no cloud in sight. The world kept turning. And this annoyed Lambo.

His mother was dead, cancer terrorized her body, opening every door until she was bare and weak for the world to see, dying slowly in the operating table, and the world continues to spin.

The sun will go up every day, and the moon will replace it every night. The stars would shine and twinkle, dead light reaching the earth's surface. The world continues to orbit the sun. But somehow for Lambo, that all seems irrelevant now. There was no one to enjoy the sun with in a picnic. There was no one to join in stargazing. There was no one.

One by one, her mother's friends began to talk, sharing their memories with her, talking about how strong she was on her final moments. They say that her most defining feature was her smile, gentle and cheerful at the same time.

Lambo snorted at the thought. Smiles can hide a lot of things, and his mother did nothing but hide in her last moments. She hid her fear, and anger, and hopelessness. It left an ugly feeling in Lambo's chest.

* * *

Once upon a time, before cancer haunted her mother's body, before mafia decided to screw over Lambo's life, his mother would teach him how to play the piano. Her mother would often tease him, saying that his ears were that of Beethoven's. And Lambo, still not having the need to go through the harder part of life would cry and throw a tantrum. Then his mother would play the piano and he'd calm down, the mere tune calming him down. Those were the good days for Lambo.

But then his father fucked up.

Turns out, his father never told his wife that he was in the mafia, a mafia boss to boot. So when the inevitable happened, he left her with Lambo in tow with no explanation whatsoever. His father did the cruelest thing he could do to a mother. He took away her child.

Lambo remembers it, the confusion and anger, the pleas, the cries. He remembers his mother holding him tight, his father screaming. He remembers the helplessness.

God, his father was a douche bag.

After that, only one thing was on Lambo's mind, he had to go back to his mother, He needed to be strong enough to get away from his father. So when the opportunity presented itself, he grabbed it with a fervor of a desperate man.

At first, he just wanted to assassinate Reborn, to prove to his father his strength and finally gain his independence. But then, shit hit the fan, and his plans needed to be revised, and other people wormed into his heart.

He was thirteen when they finally get to see other again At this age, Lambo had been properly introduced to the dark side of the mafia. By thirteen, he has seen horrors, and he has lived through wars. By thirteen, gone was the one piece cowsuit and the afro. So when he finally met his mother again, he didn't blame her if she didn't recognize him. The truth was he was contemplating if he should show himself to the woman. Being in the mafia had its consequences, and he didn't want his mother to go through them.

But when he met his eyes with his mother, he realized just how selfish he is.

And Lambo promises the mafia won't be able to touch her. Too bad cancer did.

* * *

On the day his mother died, he was in the middle of a meeting with the other guardians. The weather forecast said it would be a good day. Oh how wrong he would turn out to be.

When he finally receives a call, he felt his world stop.

* * *

After the funeral, Lambo went straight home.

His big brothers were waiting for him. All of them. The ugly feeling was making it's way into his heart again. Lambo turns to Ipin, "Did you tell them?"

Lambo didn't care anymore. He was just so very tired.

Before Ipin could answer, Tsuna intervened, "She said nothing. Kyoya did some research."

Lambo wanted to feel angry, but he just felt empty. "So I'm on your stalking list now, huh? What ever happened to privacy?"

Yamamoto was next to talk, " Lambo, we don't want to fight with you. We just want to know why didn't tell us."

Lambo rolled his eyes, " Yeah well, I just want to go to sleep. But it looks like we all can't get what we want."

"Look you just lost someone really important to you, and even though you kept her a secret. We're still here for you to the extreme," for the first time, Ryohei's voice was soft and quiet.

Great, another pitiful glance. It's not like Lambo's been the receiving end to that glance for the whole day.

"Like I said, I just want to sleep."

If his big brothers had disappointed faces, Lambo paid no heed to the guilt bubbling up inside him.

Lambo started walking towards the stairs but he faltered when Gokudera talked in a hushed voice, "Are we that untrustworthy?"

The teen stopped walking, his back was still facing them,"You don't understand."

"Then make me understand. We're your family, Lambo. Sure, we're dysfunctional and violent. But we're family. You don't keep that kind of secrets to your family. Or was I wrong to think you're family?"

Lambo's frame was shaking. He couldn't believe what he was hearing. His mother was dead. She was fifty feet below ground. And they want to do this now?

He took a few calming breath, whispering _Keep calm_ to himself. "Is that how you all feel then, huh?"

When he was met with silence he continued to talk, "How dare you," he whispered harshly because if he didn't he would have shouted and ran rampant by now. He gripped the railings tightly, still not facing them. "My mother is dead, and I am grieving. If you are my family you'd give me space and time to grieve. If you are my family you'd let me go to my room without a fuss instead of questioning my loyalty to the Vongola." He didn't know how he managed to keep his voice even and empty when he felt so so angry. He just wanted to sleep.

He punched the wall. He owed them no explanation.

But then under the haze of his misery and grief, he remembers that these people were the same people he'd gladly take a bullet for. These were the people who had been with him through every punch and kick mafia threw at him. He just lost a family member. He wasn't going to lose another. Not like this.

Feeling all his energy fade away, the teen sighs. He turned to look at his brothers. They all looked guilty and sad, even Kyoya and Mukuro, which was so very rare. And that just made him feel more shitty than he already felt.

"My mother was innocent," he started. When his brothers didn't say anything, he continued, "She had no idea about the mafia. No nightmares of hearing bullet shots, or smelling burning flesh and rotting corpse. She was completely and utterly naive and innocent, and clean from all the horrors of our world. I wanted to keep it that way, is what I'd like to say but I'm more selfish than I like to be. She was the only light left in this dark world of ours. And I didn't want it to get distinguished. She was the only normal thing I have left in my life and I wanted to keep it that way," his voice faltered for a bit, " but none of that matters now, I guess. She's dead," but no matter how many times he said it, the pain is still as stinging and hurtful.

* * *

Lambo was the first to go. He didn't care if it was disrespectful, one more second and he would have cried on the spot.

His feet took him to the park. He looked up and the sun was still shining. How infuriating.

Lambo didn't feel like going home yet. Not when he feels like wanting to murder everyone.

He planned to stay there until afternoon but unfortunately he felt someone sit beside him.

"How are you feeling?"

Lambo recognized the voice. Ipin was the only one he trusted enough to tell about his mother.

"Annoyed. The sun is too bright. I think it wants to pick a fight with me."

Ipin sighed, "Answer me properly, please."

"Then don't ask stupid questions." His voice bordering on being scatheful.

Ipin just looked at him with sadness and pity. Lambo furled his eyebrows, he didn't like being pitied. "Can we please not talk about it?"

"Lambo, I know you're really going through a hard time-"

"Please," he reiterated. His voice was not as steady as he wanted it to be at the moment.

"Alright," Ipin said. But she took Lambo's shoulder and pushed it so that his head was resting atop her shoulders. "But I'm here, okay? I'm always here."

If there were tears that was shed, Ipin said nothing. If Ipin felt Lambo take her hand and squeezed it like she would disappear in a second, Ipin said nothing. And if Ipin felt her heart break into a million pieces as her best friend break down, Ipin said nothing.

Because no words were needed. No words would ever be enough.

* * *

A/N: Because I just became addicted to Ed Sheeran's new album


End file.
